it's kinda scary how quickly people can disappear from your life so quickly, i just want to share some feelings real quick... yesterday was a pretty rough day for me, today was a rough day too though, more rough then my "normal" rough days. my mom has been sooooo depressed lately, i hate to see here like this because i love her so much, we are so close and i never know what to do to cheer her up. but then i don't even want to cheer her up when she takes it out on me..which usually happens. then i spent the whole day at dreadful work with a huge sale going on, dumb customer's asking stupid stupid questions..oh boy it was just hectic, maybe i was just in a bad mood i dunno. well then i FINALLY got off work hoping my night would be better considering i was going to a halloween party..! when i walk through the door my family is screaming at each other, common what is this?? i just went straight to my room to get ready for the party, trying to ignore them...but then i started feeling awkward showing up late..and my family started bugging me like super bad and i got some really terrible news about a friend that had gotten in a severe car wreck and passed away, i was NO longer in the mood to party. i just wanted to cry, so i did. at this point i'm starting to feel bad for myself like everything is falling apart over the past couple of days and i'm just sad, sad sad sad. whitney called me and askead if i'd like to go to the candle lighting for the friend who had passed away, i wasn't feeling like partying anymore and my family was driving me mad so i decided sure why not...even though it's not something to exactly "cheer me up" but it was really really good for me to go to. i'm extremely glad i did because it made me realize...that when everything in my life feels like crap, there's always something twenty billion times worse going on with someone else's, and i just need to be thankful for everything i have. i didn't know lindsay very well at all. but i knew that she was always happy no matter the circumstances. lindsay would light up the room with her smile, you could see the light of christ in her miles away, she was just a perfect example of what i want to be.
when i came home to tell me mom how it was we talked for a bit about trials and blessings our family has been through alot lately, i'm not gunna lie. but at the end of our conversation my mom said "yeah i'll take the trials i have right now, than loosing a kid anyday." i am so sorry to the sandstrom family for the trials that they've recently had, but i also know it's a blessing because i know it will strengthen their family and bring them closer to the gospel. i'm so excited to see lindsay again.
after the candle lighting i felt much better, it was definately really sad but i didn't feel sorry for myself anymore and i could feel the spirit, i felt peaceful through the rest of the night.
4 years ago
3 comments:
Sadie - I love you! I am so sorry that you had such a rotten day and for the loss of your friend. We missed you at our party but you were where you needed to be. We'll party with you another time. You have such a sweet spirit Sadie. Don't ever forget that people love you -- good days and bad!! Keep up the smile!
Sadie....I am so sorry to hear that you have had a rough little bit. Sometimes life really does suck and you wonder why things are happening the way that they are. I love you so much and hope that you get feeling better soon. Call me if you want to talk! love ya
you know that you can always come play with me when your having a bad day!!!!!!!! we need to play! its been forever... the thing that i realized when i found out lindsay passed away, was that it was just apart of her plan. And she is in a better place now.
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